Chalene Johnson, my kickboxing instructor and quite the fearsome female in her own right, says at the end of class “thanks for showing up to class today!”
Being alone in my living room, I thank her right back for pushing me to the brink of the pause button. But I think it’s important to not only thank your teachers and mentors and moving parts but to recognize that instead of staying seated (which I know I’ve spent most of my day doing) that I chose to move around.
Sometimes making that choice is everything.
I’ve been pretty lucky over the course of the past few months, I’ve been following my schedule nearly to the letter and I’ve really started to love the rush of endorphins every time I get my limbs coordinated. But today I hit a wall. I spent the last hour of work ferociously hungry. I was ready to go but sick of my tunes. I looked amazing but my shorts were riding up. I almost got out of downtown and I realized I had left my keys at the office.
Normally, all this would have stopped me. But I decided that today was the day I was going to push through the wall. I say that because even though I finished on Saturday, I didn’t FEEL it. I felt like I was just trudging to the finish line and getting really cranky. Around mile 5 I wondered if I would make it to 13.1 in September, let alone 26.2 next October. But I scooped up my keys and my stuff, came home, changed into capris, ate a handful of nuts and went right back out the door for round two.
The first couple blocks I was convinced I was going to puke, my legs were annoyed and I felt as big as a house. But I told myself — and I literally remember saying it — “You can do this, just one foot in front of the other, keep going,” and the next thing I knew, 2 miles down.
Some days are easier than others. Some days I ache for the pavement and the moment I get to get all silly and bop around the block. Others I make myself hit it and usually get comfortable halfway through but I hadn’t had a really mentally challenging day in quite some time.
Now that it’s over, I’m already looking forward to my run tomorrow morning.