So This is the New Year

A few days ago I was writing a letter to a very old friend of mine in Philly. Last year, her resolution was to be a better penpal. Well, that lasted approximately one letter. This year, we’ve started again.

I think my favorite thing about the relationships I’ve cultivated over the years is that I am closely bonded and networked with a wide swath of folks who support me, push me and remind me to embrace my utter humanity; something I have struggled with mightily for many years.

In any case, that letter made me realize something incredible, and I say “incredible” on many, many levels. 3 days before the anniversary of The Webinar that introduced me to User Experience, I started my career as a User Experience researcher & designer officially. An incredible achievement that I left my home, changed my life, became incredibly uncomfortable and just balls-out went for it would be remarkable for anyone. More so that it was done in such a short amount of time. EVEN more so that it’s me. Here. Writing it out. Embracing this achievement. Celebrating it. And taking great pride in it.

Historically, I’m bad at that.

While 2014 was a monumental year for growth and pushing the very fabric of myself to the limit — believe me, this was TOUGH — it ended on such a high note. I’ve accepted my current position in life (loving my job, communting too many hours a day, living with approximately 10′ x 12′ of personal space), I took a big break (thank you, work! what a huge blessing!) and I feel like I’ve come around again. Like I’ve pulled into the driveway of the house of my soul.

That said, I’m looking forward to 2015. I have a wonderful feeling about it already. It began with true love, strong, supported, loving, love on a beach in Miami. In the 4 days that have followed, I’ve made my running schedule for the year — two half marathons, one in May, the other in September — I’ve laid the groundwork for a LOT of travel, I’ve made my adult budget, I’ve promised myself to end all needless spending, I’ve promised to sketch more often, to code, to read tenaciously, to do yoga at least twice a week, to make time to relax and to love myself unconditionally.

THAT. IS. A. LOT.

Like, almost too much. But strangely enough, I feel like it all goes together. I’m energized and charged by my work, I want to sharpen my skills. I’ve come to embrace the more introverted side of my personality and learned how to nurture and care for that part of myself. I want to ensure I make time for self care. I have also realized in the last year (between the marathon and today) that I’ve become really passive and disengaged in my non-working life. Partially because of necessity during DESIGNATION and partially because it comes with the turf of moving and putting immense strain on those relationships. I want to set myself free this year.

Ever optimistic, I feel happy. I feel whole. I feel like I’m putting on my favorite pair of jeans; worn in all the right places, comfortable and look amazing every time. Let’s see what happens, 2015! I’m so glad you’re here.

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